It feels like only yesterday that I first blogged about How to Coolness, but in fact it was a few days before yesterday. At the time I was pretty sure I'd blog more informative tips about how to cool, but I wasn't sure I was up to being constrained by a timeline. Do you know why? Timelines are NOT cool. Constraints are NOT cool. Constraint by timeline is DEFINITELY NOT cool. And if you start pointing out how a negative times a negative results in a positive then so help me you are doing MATH and MATH is POSITIVELY NOT COOL. Style tip: The bold-face font means it's more true.

So I'm just as shocked as you are that I'm already back and telling you how to be cool. That is just the mystery of the universe at work. If you are ready for tip #2 on How to Coolness, then you my friend, should read on after...you know what's coming...THE JUMP!!!

COOLNESS LESSON #2: Stuck at an uncool event like a symphony? Heckle your way back to coolness.

So this lady, right? She's in a situation most of us can relate to: sitting in a music hall watching a symphony. Classical music is pretty much one of the uncoolest things out there. Ask any popular kid at the cool lunch table what his or her favorite music is, and guaranteed you will not hear "I like Bach!" Unless of course it is the beginning of the sentence "I like Bach...man Turner Overdrive" and it is 1976. And you are in Canada.


In such a situation, most of us would feel trapped under the smothering blanket of feeling like a nerd. What if someone sees me here?, we'd ask ourselves. How will I explain what I'm doing at the symphony?, we'd ponder. Why did I even get tickets to this thing?, we'd query. This lady is not most of us. THIS lady rolled up to the symphony and told it like it was and shouted "BOOOORRRRRRRRRRING" until the police came and escorted her away. AWESOME! Extra coolness bonus points lightning round: at the time of the incident, this woman's own daughter was playing with the symphony. Heckling a symphony: pretty cool. Heckling your kid while she is living her dream: now THAT'S How to Coolness!

NEXT TIME, ON HOW TO COOLNESS: I don't know, probably a picture of a dog dressed like Teen Wolf or something.
 


Comments

Sara Price
12/08/2011 18:16

How do I follow your posts or like your blog or whatever? I'm guess not knowing about technology makes me defiantly not cool...

Reply
12/13/2011 15:48

BOOOOORING!

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