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"an anne frank diary in a lisa frank notebook"
- plato

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Animal Career Day!

9/21/2012

1 Comment

 
Oh, hello there.
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You must have noticed that I'm an extremely busy and successful business dog. WOOF! I do all of the important dog business around here: typing, staring, owning one of those banker's lamps, chewing. You know, being a busy and successful business dog didn't come by accident. ARF! It  was a result of hard work, overall awesomeness, and CAREER DAY! YARP YARP YARP YARP YARP!

That's right, I'm talking about Career Day: a special day in an animal's life where he or she can fully explore the opportunities that lay ahead. BAUWROOOOOOOOO! There are a million jobs just sitting out there in the world like a bunch of dog butts just waiting to be sniffed. I used my dog business connections to sponsor one of these career days, so that I may give other animals the same opportunities that I had.
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Lookie hoo! This is exploring the exciting world of computer programming. Should we put Java on his resume under name or skills? Yowza! RWAWR RWAWRR RWARR!
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What are the odds?  This hedgehog is also using a computer, but he's working in a totally different field: portfolio management! I'd "hedge" my bets that this guy will "hog" all the shares in your "hedge" fund...hog.
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Three fabulous words: GAY FASHION DESIGN
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This dedicated Dachsund is manning the mic at one of the many I Heart Radios across the great nation. BOW WOW OW OW OW! I heard a rumor that whenever they do radio contests, his boss makes him say "We have a wiener...dog" and then he goes into the bathroom and just cries and cries. It's just a rumopr though? ARRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOO
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Sigh. Some of us don't have to work because we have trust funds. Kids, don't be that guy.
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Some animals follow careers that nurse a more creative side. Take this fellow, for example. YIP YIP YIP! He used to work with Paula Deen, but split once they realized they had the same haircut. URF URF RRRRRUFF!
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Workaholism is a real problem with these career day cats. No really - this cat is a professional gambler and cannot stop. He needs help- badly! Also he has some kind of cat drinking problem (only drinks out of the toilet, I hear). WOOF
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This dog is writing the soundtrack to Mr Holland's Opus.
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HA HA WERF WERF HA IT'S A DOG IN A LAB COAT AND THE DOG IS A LAB HA HA HAWERF HA OWWW
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Hate cubicles? Love the outdoors? Partially paralyzed in a horrific accident? Perhaps a career in animal Murderball is calling your name!
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We can't all be the boss dog behind the big dig desk. Some of us run businesses and some of us take dictation. There's no shame in being an administrative assistant. Say hello to...secreterrier. AWWWWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
1 Comment
Laura
9/20/2012 11:50:04 pm

I like the turtle's little gold hat. And his general air of entitlement.

Reply



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