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"an anne frank diary in a lisa frank notebook"
- plato

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Alien or Antidepressant?

11/8/2012

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Are you ready for the super funnest game that has ever super funned? I;ll wait for you to shout "You bet, Alexis!"

Hmmm hmm hmmm, la la la. Hmmmm! Ok, ready?

Zoloft, Paxil, Prozac. Someone got paid "mucho dinero" (which I think is Spanish for "big diner") to come up with those zany names that will convince sad people to, you know, swallow. But those names! So crazy! HOW CRAZY ARE THEY, ALEXIS!?! So crazy they could be...alien!

Here's a list of twenty aliens or twenty antidepressants. It's up to you to figure out which is which! Fair warning: one of the 'antidepressants' is really more of a treatment for Alzheimer's, which is often comorbid with geriatric depression, so I counted it. Whaddyagonna do. If you want accuracy, go marry an archer! Ladies and gentlemen, start your FUNgines!

1. Cymbalta
2. Zaphod
3. Marplan
4. Lirin
5. Pristiq
6. Barabel
7. Vardovin
8. Nardil
9. Pexeva
10. Prostetnic
11. Arapto
12. Aricept
13. Sarafem
14. Feltipern
15. Lwaxana
16. Luvox
17. Savella
18. Moplin
19. Vilazodone
20. Norcuna

Good luck! I'll post the answers, oh I dunno, this week.
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Election Jokes

11/6/2012

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Today is Election Day: the most important and insufferable day on our national calendar! Celebrate our nation's commitment to government by the people by pressing a little button, then avoiding all of your friends who won't shut up about how awesome voting is! Also stay away from the ones who tell you that voting doesn't matter. Apathy is contagious!

I'll definitely be voting. Unfortunately, my preferred candidate did not make it on the ballot. They said he was ineligible! Can you believe it?!? Just because he is not human and also long dead? Pssssh. Racism rears its ugly head, you guys.
Picture
Looks like I'll just have to make do with a human, living candidate who as far as I know does not play any keyboards. Lesser of two evils, maaaaan.

HERE ARE THE JOKES

Q: How did the town decide which leper to avoid?
A: An elect-shun.


Mitt Romney walked in to a bar. He asked the bartender, "Is this a bar?" The bartender replied "Yes, this is a bar. This is Joe's Bar and I am a bartender." Romney asked, "Are you sure this is a BAR?" Frustrated, the bartender said "YES this is a bar! What did I just say?" Romney sighed and said, "Well I can't drink here. I'm a rePUBlican!" The bartender said nothing, just blinked a few times in stone-faced disapproval.


Q: Why did the voter get shot in the head?
A: He voted in a John Wilkes Booth!


Q: Why did the psychoanalysts take the ballots away from the college students?
A: Because the Voter Freud committee decided they were too Jung


Q: Why did Obama go to Ikea?
CHOOSE YOUR FAVORITE PUNCHLINE BASED ON YOUR PARTICULAR POLITICAL AFFILIATION!

A: Because he is a relatable everyman who demonstrates his ability to use government resources wisely by using discretion when spending his personal resources!

A: Because he is a socialist Commie who hates America and all things American made. Ikea more like IKENYA, amiright you guys!

A: 'Cause... you know, he needed a new... cabinet.


HAPPY DEOMCRACY YOU GUYSSSSSSSSSSS
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