Anyway, you're probably so excited for the upcoming weeks that you are hard and/or wet! Yes, you are soaking wet from watering your patriotic victory garden so much, and you are hard from the additional muscle you've put on as a result of lifting heavy campaign signs! What an exciting time! Also, your sex junk is all tingly.
I know my dozens and dozens of readers count on me for up-to-the-minute coverage de eleccion (which is French for "Election Coverage said in a made-up Spanish dialect"). I shall not disappoint. I AM YOUR BLOGGER AND YE SHALL NOT WANT! Now, go forth! And click on the Read More link! AND REEEEEAAAAAAAD MORRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
The first statement was made by the incumbent (pictured).